Since we’re already mostly through February, this is a little late, but here we go. I’ll start with the spate of sequels due out this year, and then continue later with 2007’s other offerings.
Sequels are back again, and will be jamming theaters this year. (Other trends of note include the continuing flood of horror movie remakes, and superhero movies.) However, we’re really in the beginning of the latest surge of them, and because of this, many might actually be good and are likely, in any case, to make a lot of money.
And then the usual result will occur, to wit, Hollywood will think “Sequels are hot again!” and start churning out sequels to successful films that really didn’t need sequels—Charlie’s Angels, Lara Croft, etc.—and they will suck or just not interest people. Thus audiences will not support them, and Hollywood will think, “Sequels are dead again!”, and move on to whatever the new trend is at that point.
Here’s a 2007 preview of big budget sequels. Oddly, there seem more #3 movies this year than first sequels, and most of them I actually want to see (and this from a guy who maybe sees a dozen movies a year in the theater):
28 Weeks Later: Probably the only horror sequel this year that I have even a small chance of going to see. Zombie films aren’t really my bag, but there have been a lot of pretty good ones the last several years.Alien vs. Predator 2: I didn’t see the first one, so I can’t really comment much on this. However, I don’t anyone really thought the first one was that great, so there’s no reason that this one couldn’t improve on the first. Uhm, except that they seldom do. December.
Are We Done Yet? A sequel to Cedric the Entertainer’s Are We There Yet. Really?!* This one involves a Money Pit-style ‘comic’ (I’ll bet) house refurbishing. Co-stars John C. McGinley, who I bet ends up looking really angry at some point. April.
[*Stupified, semi-appalled “Really?!” exclamation stolen without permission from Tina Robin, the wife of Joe “Opposable Thumb Films” Bannerman. I guess Tina could sue me, but they’ve got a new baby daughter to keep them busy. BWAHAHAHA!!]Bean II: Mr. Bean returns to the big screen. You may not remember, but the first Mr. Bean movie, now barely remembered, made a giant crapload of money when it came out. I expect this will be about the same, mildly amusing, but really something you wait to rent on DVD. September.
The Bourne Ultimatum (3rd of the Series): I’ve complained for years about how insanely ‘big’ and overstuffed action films got. Apparently I’m not the only one tired of this trend, given the success of the Bourne films, which I like a lot. Interestingly, they seem to have even had an effect on the venerable Bond movies, as Casino Royale was the most scaled-down Bond film since maybe From Russia With Love. And it was terrific, too. I will definitely see this. August.
Evan Almighty: An interesting idea, to make a sequel to Bruce Almighty but focusing on less-expensive rising star Steve Carrell in order to jettison huge paycheck earner Jim Carrey. God (Morgan Freeman, again) orders Carrell (who apparently was in the first movie) to build an Ark, ala Noah. The preview makes it look sort of like The Santa Clause, although that may only be cosmetic.
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: They’ve done a pretty good job keeping this series working, and I don’t see why this would be any different. Add in the publicity over the last Potter novel (due out soon), and expect an even hotter box office than usual for this already venerable series.
The Hills Have Eyes II: What-ever.
Hostel: Part II: See above.
Live Free or Die Hard: This is the fourth Die Hard movie, although from what I hear, it ignores the third one, so it’s kind of a third entry in a way, too. Even so…another Die Hard? Really? I cringed at the trailer when one nervous character notes Willis’ calm regarding the oversized carnage and asks, “Have you done this before?” It’s supposed to be funny, see? Because of the other Die Hard movies…get it? Even though the question is so weird that no real person would ever ask it. Blech. June.
Ocean’s 13: Unlike a lot of people, I thought Ocean’s 12 was at least a decent timewaster. Partly, that might be because I love heist movies. So I’ll probably make a rare trip to the theater to see this, although even I wonder if this movie is strictly necessary. June.
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (Third of the Series): I don’t love these by any means, but they are pretty good, and the last one really confirmed Depp’s star status. Plus, you can’t help but be heartened not only by the hilarious-in-itself appearance of Keith Richards as Jack Sparrow’s father. Since Depp partly based his character on Richards, that’s comedy gold, right there. Then too, Chow Yun Fat is joining the cast, and there’s no cooler dude on Earth, even if all his American films so far have been crap. In any case, there’s no reason to believe this will suck, or fail to make a zillion dollars. May.
Resident Evil: Extinction (Third of the Series): A third Resident Evil? Really?
Rush Hour 3: Like Men in Black II, a film a studio so hungered to make that they signed off on insanely huge talent deals, meaning it’s functionally nearly impossible for this to make any sort of profit. And while I like Jackie Chan, c’mon, another Rush Hour? Yawn. Aug.
Saw IV: Never ‘saw’ the other ones (HAHAHAHAHA!), won’t see this.
Shrek the Third: Liked the first two, so why not this one? And it answers the question of what the hell Mike Myers has been up to lately. May.
Spider-Man 3: I actually have a small amount of trepidation for this, despite my essential trust in Sam Raimi. (Of course, I trusted Peter Jackson’s King Kong, too, and wasn’t entirely happy with that, either.) While part of this is just the awareness that Spider-Man 2 is going to be very hard to top, I have other qualms. First…not a big fan of Venom. Too new-school. On the other hand, I kind of like the doppelganger thing with Topher Grace. Still, though, Venom. Blech. Second, while Sandman is a lot more up my alley, the whole thing where (spoiler alert) he’s the guy that killed Uncle Ben is a) entirely lame and misconceived and screenwritey in a bad sense, and b) already done, with similarly bad results, in Tim Burton’s Batman. Third, like the Schumacher Batmans, this thing seems to have waaaay too much going on. Two villains (maybe three, vis a vis Harry Osborn/Green Goblin/Hobgoblin/Whatever); adding additional supporting cast members (including Gwen Stacey and her father, apparently, which also raises huge continuity problems) to a large extant cast; more romantic travails for Peter & Mary Jane, which is already getting old, etc. I’m not saying this is awful, but I wouldn’t be surprised to be actually disappointed by this. I hope I’m wrong, but…
