What the hell, IMDB?

Updated on January 23, 2007 By Ken Begg 12 Comments

So I’m working on this preview of the films coming out in 2007, and I notice something weird. The IMDB has made a truly bizarre change. It’s so dumb I’m not sure you could design something dumber.

Instead of listing the casts for new movies in star order, they are listing all the actors in alphabetical order. For example, take the page for the upcoming action movie Shooter. The film’s star, Mark Walhberg, is listed 38th in the IMDB cast list, because his name starts with a ‘W’.

That’s just retarded. When people go to the IMDB, and call up a film’s data page, they want to see the stars of the movie listed first. With the new system, there’s no way to tell who plays the main characters and who has a one-line bit part. From the listings for Shooter, you’d think Walberg had a minor cameo appearance. Instead, he plays the film’s lead.

This is so dumb that I’m sure they’ll change it quickly, but really, who thought it was a good idea to start with?

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  • Jack Spencer

    I wouldn’t worry about it. It may be they just haven’t updated the cast list for Shooter yet. Looking at a few other entries for 2007, it seems they tend to list the cast alphabetically by default, and then adjust it to list the stars by billing and they just haven’t done that with Shooter yet. Wait a couple weeks and they’ll fix it.

  • Ed

    This brand of PC feelgood absurdity has spilled over into everything. The worst is when you’re installing software on your computer and the installation program asks you for your destination and you actually have to scroll to the Us for “United States.” Some developers get it and actually put the US at the top and then list other countries alphabetically, some do not and assume people in Afghanistan, Giana, Tadzhikstan, Samoa, Somalia, belong on the mile long list ahead of the United States (where in all likelihood, 90% of the downloads are taking place).

    I wouldn’t be surprised if the end credits in Hollywood go from star order or “In Order of Appearance” to “Alphabetical Order” because, you know, hierarchies are oppressive. Doubt we’ll see PC Hollywood getting that crazy though. Hierarchies are oppressive to them excepting their star system and Fidel Castro (die already) of course.

  • This doesn’t seem to be the case for older movies. Probably they just put the cast lists in alphabetical order because it was faster, knowing that some member would read the movie’s page and correct it for them. It’s more “lazyness” than “stupidity”, methinks.

    The collective power of the internet will likely rectify this shortly.

  • Jimmy

    I think it most likely that it does have more to do with IMDB tardiness in updating than being a symptom of some wide reaching PC groupthink conspiracy.

  • Ed Richardson

    Whatever the reason, none of us would take a multi-million dollar Hollywood movie (or Bollywood, Hong Kong, or Tokyo movie for that matter) and list the starring players alphabetically any more than we would list them alphabetically on the billing for a major opera. Stars are stars for a reason. I mean really, can you imagine them listing a bevy of nobodies before hitting on “P” for Pacino?

    That just doesn’t wash. If it’s PC “we don’t want to show preference for the stars” nonsense, then the ironic part is that preference is shown for those with last names ending in A, B, C, D.

    Moronic.

  • Kevin P

    For what it’s worth, in the current iteration of the Shooter listing on IMDb, Wahlberg is still in the “alphabetical” cast list, but contrary to the label the list is no longer alphabetical, and Wahlberg is on top of the list. Still, he remains below Dean MacKenzie and Jonathan Walker, the only current entries in the “credits order” section of the cast list.

    Basically it sounds like they’ve just got a few kinks to work out of their process of adding new movies to their database.

  • Ed Richardson

    And for what it’s worth I love IMDB. One just gets concerned (READ: frightened) over the creepy feel-good weepy hand-holding nuttiness that infects our culture. IMDB is one thing, but it’s another when local legislators force businesses to ban smoking in their establishments, or when the largest city in the United States bans “trans-fat” out of the blue (NYC has tens of thousands of restaurants; do the owners of Burritoville really know what “trans-fat” even is? Or care for that matter?). It’s the same kind of creepy PC groupthink that forces cheerleaders at state-run schools to cheer at girls’ games.

    You can submerge a crucifix in a jar of urine and get a federal arts grant but if you hate someone you are a criminal.

    Many in power want no winners and no losers in America, A’s on report cards and no F’s. They seek to turn it into a tepid socialist miasma of mediocrity. I say socialist because like communist their entire worldview consist of the “haves” and “have nots.” Victimology is their foundation.

    I know IMDB doesn’t count for much in this battle, but it would utterly creepy to see them subscribing to the notion that “well, everyone should be treated equally.”

    Yeah, star Russell Crowe in your seafaring classic and give him 15th billion and see what happens.

  • Okay. It’s Alphabetical because that’s easier to automate. It is not some gigantic PC conspiracy. It is not offensive to Christians. It is not banning smoking or banning trans fat or cheering for girls rugby (One of these things, is not like the other. One of these things, doesn’t belong).

    Nor is it the IMDB’s crafty attempt to overthrow capitalism and give everyone As. That involves much more peanut butter and a goat.

    It’s certainly not becuse the IMDB is afraid of hurting character actor’s feelings. Current movies are listed in *billing order*. That is their policy on movies. Probably the guy who made the entry was in a hurry and didn’t feel like looking up to see if Kate Mara deserved to be listed ahead of Ned Beatty (likely, he didn’t know the billing order. Since the movie isn’t out yet), so he just had his word processor do it alphebetically and figured someone more interested in the movie than he would fix it later.

    That’s it. There’s no conspiracy here. Relax.

  • Xander77

    We actually need evidence for our insane conspirasy rants? The very attempt to make such and absurd claim proves that you’re a pinko communist out to ruin this great nation!

  • Kimberly

    Actually, given how fussy actors are about the order in which their names appear, it’s very funny to imagine some airheaded A-lister tossing a fit because they’re 23rd on the IMDB cast list. I wouldn’t be surprised if that violated a contract requirement…

  • Ericb

    Shouldn’t the Vast Left Wing Conspiracy and the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy cancel each other out at some point?

  • Jack Spencer

    Actually, no. Right and Left Wing conspiracies just keep flapping until it takes off, flies away, and then crashes into a mountain because it can’t decide if it should bank left or right.