Monster of the Day #406

Updated on January 11, 2012 By Ken Begg 28 Comments

“Palmolive? Your hands were just soaking in it!”*

[*Note: If you’re under like 50 years of age, don’t even bother trying to understand this joke.]

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By Ken Begg

http://jabootu.net

Anonymous

47, and I get it. Madge!

(the photo- not so much)
Ericb

Me too. Madge should be a monster of the day sometime.
The Rev.

I’m 35 next month, and I got it, as well.

Don’t know the movie, though.
Anonymous

Slightly (none of your business how much) older than the Rev and have no trouble remember ing Madge, the ad campaign ran well into the 80s.
Cullen Waters

I have no idea what you guys are talking about. You’re all, like, totally old.
Ericb

Madge was the Progressive Flo of her era.
Anonymous

WHAT’S THAT?! STOP MUMBLING, WILL YOU?!
skrag2112

Just turned 43. Got it. Sigh.
Anonymous

Yeah, forty-one here and I remember the ads. Don’t know how long they ran but as GJ pointed out it was right up into the ’80s.

Frankly, I don’t find these poor guys all that scary, I mostly feel sorry for them. Though I guess it would be scary to have something like that happen to you though.
Anonymous

can I keep doing it until I need gloves?
Anonymous

Completely unrelated, but I saw the worst case of irritant contact dermatitis in a patient I had ever seen yesterday, all from handwashing.

I guess my point is, don’t soak in Palmolive? Or something.
Anonymous

Are you sure that wasn’t Rosie, the Bounty Lady?
Ericb

You’re probably right.
Rock Baker

But I see he’s been using HALO shampoo! Soaping dulls your hair, HALO glorifies your hair! So, HALO everybody, HALO…..

Just for the record, the film is ATOM AGE VAMPIRE. I don’t, however, recall a scene where he tried to move an upright pencil across a black marble board with his mind…..
Anonymous

Oh wow, I guess I have seen this one, but so long ago I had forgotten what the “vampire” looked like. I do remember being singularly unimpressed, probably because I was still at that age where I thought all vamps should have at least a passing resemblance to either Kiefer Sutherland or Jason Patric, but don’t remember a damn thing about the plot. I also tend to get this one confused in my head with “Planet of the Vampires” which I vaguely remember having vamps that looked like this guy, had he been Philippino and sporting 15 inch fangs.
Flangepart

“The tiny Washington monument on the desk is a Theremen? COOL!”
Rock Baker

I think you’re thinking of HORROR OF THE BLOOD MONSTERS (aka VAMPIRE MEN OF THE LOST PLANET). PLANET OF THE VAMPIRES involved body-stealing aliens/zombies more so than vampires.

You’re right, though, not a lot of ATOM AGE VAMPIRE seems to stick in the memory banks. I recall it being a good concept, and a handful of good visuals, but told at a snail’s pace.
Anonymous

I am sure you are correct and equally certain I saw it under the latter title. I have an amazing ability to jumble movies and titles in my head at this point. Of course it doesn’t help when half the titles are variations on a theme, meant to capitalize on whatever was hot that week. Add in the various re-release titles for crappy and foriegn films and I’m lucky to get 80% right.

For some reason I am also recalling the Filipino flick having tints, which struck me as really odd, since that is something I associate almost exclusively with higher-budget silent films.
Rock Baker

Your recollections are correct, though, HORROR OF THE BLOOD MONSTERS did have tints. It began life as a Filipino caveman movie shot in black and white. It was imported at a time when color films were becoming the norm, so it was turned into a bizarre space-opera with ever-changing color tints meant to be the weird polarization effects of the local atmosphere! It was altered again before release to become a space-vampire movie! (The VAMPIRE MEN OF THE LOST PLANET title was for the TV version, I understand. Confusion on this title is natural, as I think it had upwards of six different titles over the years! HORROR OF THE BLOOD MONSTERS was the first theatrical title, which is why I’m using it.)
Anonymous

See, this is why I love you guys! No matter how odd or obscure the vaguely recalled movie I saw once on Shocking Theater in 1989 or so, someone here has not only also seen it, but can offer me details. Makes my little nerd heart all warm and fuzzy. (seriously)
Rock Baker

Just think how happy it makes us to hear that! It means we haven’t crammed all this trivia into our brains COMPLETELY in vain!
Sandy Petersen

the film you saw is even likelier to be THE BLOOD DRINKERS, also filipino, and featuring lots of bizarre tinting of the scenes, varying from blue to red to green. Some parts are even in crude color. It’s like it got dipped in Mario Bava’s paintbox.

BLOOD DRINKERS is great though, because it has a mad scientist, and a midget, and a hunchback, and they’re ALL vampires! Also when they turn into a bat, it’s a fruit bat! Which I find immensely entertaining.
Sandy Petersen

also you guys all suck for being so young. 41 indeed.
Anonymous

Nope, a quick IMDB search yesterday showed me that Rock is correct. But I appreciate the willingness of everyone to pitch in and assist my steel-sieve-like memory.
Flangepart

also you guys all suck for being so young. 41 indeed.
Hey, I turned 56 yesterday. The same year Godzilla was released in the U.S.
I like that thought…
Marsden

I remember Mr. Whipple.
Sandy Petersen

Finally someone who is a reasonable age. Though I turned 56 some months ago. I have spent my entire life under the shadow of Godzilla.
Rock Baker

Not to brag, but I’m a child of Nov. 3rd, the date of Godzilla’s original coming out party (also the birthday of one Mr. Charles Bronson). Canceling whatever level of ‘cool’ that information might have, however, would be the fact that I am a scant 30 years of age, and therefore unworthy of such an honor.

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