Monster of the Day #251

Updated on May 9, 2011 By Ken Begg 20 Comments

Mondays!

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    “Now, where did I park my car?”

  • A bad case of crabs?

  • Ericb

    “Damn, these things are more annoying than pomegranates.”

  • “Dammit, Ray! I just bought that car!”

  • Pip

    Carrie Crab sings the Bay Crab Blues: “I’m a Rewards Plus Member dammit! My ride to Dewey Beach will not be another Dodge Neon!”

  • roger h

    you know, it is really all those stupid car alarms going off that is the most annoying.

  • There is a whole series of killer giant crab books by an English hack writer which I have read several of. I love giant crabs a lot, not least because they don’t terrify me in the slightest.

  • The Rev.

    Is this a cover for one of those books? That’s the only thing I could come up with for this.

    Scott Foy once read a portion of a story from one of those books. It was hilarious and convinced me that someday I should find one of these books and read them.

  • fish eye no miko

    roger h said: “you know, it is really all those stupid car alarms going off that is the most annoying.”

    LOL! Ain’t that the truth…

    BobTanaka said: “‘Dammit, Ray! I just bought that car!'”

    “I knew I shouldn’t’ve taught him to play fetch…”

  • Sandy is no doubt referring to the hilariously bleak, trashy and gory giant crab novels of Guy Smith. They’ve long been out of print here, as far as I know, and become sort of collectors’ items.

  • Rock Baker

    Not a screaming woman to be found anywhere! What’s the world coming to?

    I wouldn’t know about the Guy Smith books, but here’s a quick list of the giant crustaceans of the silver screen that I’m aware of:

    Attack of the Crab Monsters
    Port Sinister
    Space Probe Taurus
    Godzilla Versus the Sea Monster
    Lobster Man From Mars
    When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth
    Mysterious Island
    Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea (series)

    Now what am I missing? (And should I include the robot crawdad from the Tobey Danger skit?)

  • Rock Baker

    Oh! I should mention a weird 400′ cartoon I have from behind the iron curtain called The Mechanical Crab. I have no clue when it was made (could be late 60s to the mid 80s), but concerns a mad plot to create a race of indestructible metal crustaceans on an uncharted island. They grow and grow, until a massive metal crab is all that remains! I think it’s about the size of today’s critter. I’d be glad to lend it out for one of your get togethers if you’re set up for Super 8.

  • Rock Baker

    Oh! The Claw Monsters, I forgot that one! (Which is the feature version of the serial Panther Girl of the Congo, for those keeping track.)

  • I think both Yog and Hammer’s Lost Continent have giant crabs monsters. And Island Claw is built around one, although it only shows up at the end. It’s a huge fiberglass prop one, though, so naturally I am completely in love with it.

  • Rock Baker

    Ah, yes! Island Claws and Yog (which has TWO giant crabs!) are so obvious! No wonder I missed them! Even so, until reflecting on the matter, I wasn’t aware of just how many such creatures are on film!

    (Another one I forgot was the giant crab from the Johnny Quest episode!)

  • I completely forgot the JQ crab, too, until I ran across a still of it. I still don’t remember the episode. I wonder if it got ran less in reruns or something.

    The Port Sinister ones are the most obscure, though, so bonus points for that.

  • Ericb

    Doctor Who had the Macra which, though alien, were pretty crabby.

  • Rock Baker

    Haven’t seen Port Sinister yet, but the description in the Sinister Cinema catalog claims the film features said creatures. With a release date (again, according to the catalog) of 1953, it may pre-date THEM! in the big bug cycle, though I have my doubts that its really THAT type of film. (I do remain anxious to see it, though.)

  • Port Sinister is kind of a queer duck; it’s basically just an action adventure piece (and a pretty lame one, to boot), but there are two scenes with giant (dog-sized) crab(s). Check out YouTube for the two crab scenes, although the video quality is pretty bad.

  • BeckoningChasm

    I actually have two of Guy N. Smith’s crab books, “Night of the Crabs” and “The Origin of the Crabs.” They’re not great but not bad, gory and fatalistic and, um, don’t get too attached to any of the characters IYKWIMAITYD.