The best episode of ST: TNG they never did.

Data is studying humor.  He’s simulating a series of classic comedians (including Vartok the Hilarious of Rigal 7) on the Holodeck when the Enterprise flies into an energy cloud or other Techno-MacGuffin and the ship is rocked and sparks start flying out of stuff and etc.

Data hies to Engineering, to find Jordi Geordi explaining to Picard that the warp engines are down and they will need to call in bigwig help to fix them.  Meanwhile, the energy pulses have brought to life the Three Stooges in the Holodeck.  They stumble around until finding some uniforms (Wesley Crusher takes a pie in the face at some point or other), at which point they are mistaken for the “three warp core specialists” Jordi’s Geordi’s been expecting.  Jordi Geordi leaves Engineering, after Moe promises “you won’t recognize the place when we get through with it.”  Things do on from there, until Worf appears, surveys the damage, and fumes, “It’s impossible!  Impossible!”  He then chases the Stooges around so as to inflict grevious bodily harm upon them, but the Enterprise explodes, and we see his ghost chasing the ghosts of the Stooges as the Three Stooges theme is heard.

Actually, I guess that’s why they didn’t do this episode.  Once you bring the Stooges in, you can only end the episode by blowing up the ship.

  • roger h

    Wait, I got it, the Enterprises encounters a planet that parallels Earth called Freedonia which is at perpetual war with a planet called Sylvania. . .

    Hey, at least the Enterprise does not have to blow up at the end.

  • roger h

    oops, I mean only one Enterprise, however. . .

  • Ericb

    Or they could have dropped the Three Stooges on some planet with an emerging civilization and then have a sequel episode where the Enterprise falls through a temporal rift and returns to the planet 100 years later and finds that the entire civilization is based on the Three Stooges.

  • Food

    Lol, good stuff!

    Damn Ken, where did THAT come from?

  • Pilgrim

    Back in the day, I thought *this* was the best episode they never did.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_9eGjZoYoc

    Then again, I was a wierd kid.

  • Man, I had that idea back when the show was still on. I used to have a fairly elaborate presentation, that was mostly effective in ratio to how well you knew both ST TNG and Stooge shorts. For instance, Worf is *just* like any number of towering, wooden, violent hotheads who would menace the Stooges. That “It’s impossible! Impossible!” is actually from one of the shorts where the guys ‘redecorated’ an an apartment or office and naturally destroyed the place in the process.

    Now, if I could just fit the “Ma-hah? Ah-ha!” sketch in there…

  • BeckoningChasm

    Of course, when the show actually DID show Data studying humor, they used…Joe Piscopo. (This is kind of like studying ice by building a roaring fire.)

    I like your idea better. Of course, I also like the variant on the TOS “gangster” show mentioned here too.

  • Sandy Petersen

    I would argue that at the end of Duck Soup, Freedonia is pretty much “blown up”. And seeing the stooges aboard the Enterprise might actually have changed my opinion of ST:TNG to a positive one.

  • “And seeing the stooges aboard the Enterprise might actually have changed my opinion of ST:TNG to a positive one.”

    That, or an episode based on the events of King Dinosaur.

  • Danny

    How fundamentally sad is it that my first thought upon reading that was “He spelled Geordi wrong”, and not “This is absurd/awesome/absurdly awesome”?

    Seriously, though. …What?

  • Davey G

    Hmm, not too shabby at all. Makes perfect sense. The only problem is that the stooges wouldn’t be able to leave the holodeck…

  • Danny: It means “One of us…one of us…” (I KNEW I should have checked that.)

    Davey: I find the writers on TNG pretty much bent the rules where necessary where the Holodeck was concerned. Still, you could toss interference from Q in there too, if you want.

  • KeithB

    If the Enterprise blows up at the end it just means that it is one of the movies, not a TV episode. Now if I could just figure out whether it is an even or odd one…

  • Tork_110

    “Go get the tools!”

    “What tools?”

    “The same tools we’ve been using since star date XXXXX.X!”

    “OH, those tools!”

  • Eric Hinkle

    It really is a shame they never made this episode.