Laurell K. Hamilton, you have a lot to answer for…

Geez, these things are growing like kudzu:

From the author of The Vampire Shrink

What happens when a simple radio interview turns Kismet Knight’s [!!] world upside-down…again.

Denver Psychologsit Kismet Knight counsels vampires. Her life changed forever when she discovered a dark preternatural underworld, became involved with gorgeous, eight-centuries-old Devereux–the powerful leader of a vampire coven–and was forced to reconsider her ideas about “reality.” Now, there’s a new problem. Lyren Hallow, Vampire Hunter Extraordinaire, has come to “harvest” a local bloodsucker and it seems the charismatic fiend has disturbing plans for Kismet, as well. When Devereux steps in to protect the woman he insists is his “mate,” the undead fireworks begin.”

Yeesh. I swear, there’s a new book like this every friggin’ week.

  • Ericb

    I’m sick of vampires, though I see no end to this. In the future we’ll have, Vampire Doctors, Vampire Presidents, Vampire Athletes, a Vampire Oprah, Vampire Talk-Radio, Vampire Pets, Vampire Reality Television, a Vampire Cable Network, etc.

  • ERicb

    And another thing, who names their kid “Kismet?” Her parents must have been hippies … or, hmmmm, maybe they were Vampire Hippies?

  • But is Kismet also “The Chosen One”?

  • Actually, I am not sick of vampires so much as I am sick of Anne Rice style vampires. If someone were to revive feral vampires in the Christophr Lee style, or even the Nosferatu style. Or else the outright evil vampires of Count Yorga, I would be happy.

    For all that, right now I would be happy to see some amoral vampire lesbians.

    But all we get are either whiny, tortured vampires or else romance novel heroes with fangs. (Sadly, one of my favorite vampires, Mamuwalde, falls in the former category. But at least he had some hint of evil the current crowd seem to lack. And his hackneyed plot was written 35 years ago, making it a little less tired at the time than it is today.)

    Can someone please come up with a novel take on vampires? Or at least steal from someone other than Anne Rice and her imitators?

  • Ericb

    Well, yeah, I meant Anne Rice vampires. Granted I haven’t been on the look out but the old fashioned evil vampires seem to be in short supply lately.

  • Zandor Vorkov

    It’s interesting.

    Human female/vampire male romance books (most of them written by women) tend to be about true love and how a woman’s love can change even the worst man for the better.

    Human male/vampire female romance books (most of them written by men) tend to be about the vampire using the man and how women’s love is poison and will destroy even the strongest man.

  • GalaxyJane

    Could be worse I suppose, an author I was talking to at a con in January said his agent had hit him up to write a story for a “Zombie Romance” anthology. He sensibly refrained from going there.

    BTW, are all the quotation marks original to the blurb? I mean are the concepts “reality”, “harvest” and “mate” really all that subjective? Just curious really.

  • I thought the quotation marks were funny, too. I guessed “harvest” had a distinct meaning in this universe (although I think the average reader would have sussed it out via context), but really, does “mate” really need quote marks? Even assuming it’s some heightened vampiric usage of the word, a “mate” is still a mate.

  • Mr. Blue

    One Japanese take on vampires is rather interesting: Try the Hellsing Ultimate anime series. In that, you have a gun slinging Alucard who revels in blasting his opponets into tiny bits. Technally, he is fighting for the good guys (against vampire nazis, no less), but he does not allow simple things like colaterall damage get in his way. Bloody, but kind of cool.

  • EFH

    Here is a wacky idea, bring back their vulnerabilities. How long has it been since religion worked? Even stakes and daylight are going away.

    And we all have Twilight to look forward to later this year.

    Vampires that frigging sparkle. Yeash, and people wonder about my irrational hatred of vampires.

  • Greenhornet

    I haven’t read a good vampire novel since “The Dracula Tapes”. I found “Interview With The Vampire” boring and couldn’t get past three chapters.

  • I’m fully behind Andrew on this one. Give me Nosferatu any day of the week. Vampires are at their best when they’re malevolence personified. None of this ‘humanity’ gumph.

  • Actually, I just realized there is two recent films which did break with the “tortured soul” or “hunk with fangs” model, but I am not sure I would recommend it. They are Bloodrayne and Van Helsing.

    So, apparently if you want actual evil vampires today you have to accept horrible movies.

    What a choice.

    Ok. I suppose the rapidly decline “From Dusk Til Dawn” franchise had real vampires too. But in that case you either had to put up with Quentin Tarrantino (and I am getting ever less patient with him), or else put up with those exploiting his name to prop up schlock movies.

    Wow, that choice is looking even worse.

    Maybe I will have to join Ericb and say I am sick of vampires as well.

  • Matt B

    Andrew, IIRC “Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter” had a number of lesbian vampires in it.

    Granted, it may not be to everyone’s taste…

    (Personally, I would love to see someone film Skipp and Spector’s “The Light at the End” at some point.)

  • I’m not sure where you got the blurb you reproduced above. I didn’t add all those quotation marks. Perhaps you did. Anyway, I like all vampire books — from the monster variety to the paranormal romances to the urban fantasies. To each, her/his own. By the way, the name Kismet is explained in book 2. Have a great day.
    Lynda Hilburn
    THE VAMPIRE SHRINK
    DARK HARVEST
    http://www.lyndahilburnauthor.com

  • Ms. Hilburn — The quote marks are in the ad featured in a recent (I think) Publisher Weekly, although it may have been Library Journal. It was a third page column ad that appeared opposite new novel reviews.

    Good luck with your books.

  • fish eye no miko

    EFH said: “Here is a wacky idea, bring back their vulnerabilities. How long has it been since religion worked?”

    Indeed! Just show a vampire a statue of the Buddha, and he’ll go away.

    “Even stakes and daylight are going away.”

    [sigh]
    Daylight is a recent thing. If you read Dracula, you’ll see that the Count has no problem with daylight. It wasn’t until Nosferatu that that was an issue.

  • The Rev. D.D.

    Doesn’t religion work in the Anita Blake books? The older ones, where there was still a story and it wasn’t porn 24-7? It’s been a while since I reread them, so maybe I’m incorrect on that.