Monster of the Day #3235

Updated on August 3, 2021 By Ken Begg 15 Comments

My first thought was “what a goofy cover,” but my second thought on reflection was “Yikes!!”  Also, nobody likes to have their Safety Dance interrupted.

The Olympics add new events all the time (hence the adorable 13 year old who won a Gold Medal in Skateboarding). Some of the proposed ones for Olympics 2438 look kind of odd, though.

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  • Beckoning Chasm

    For that second cover–switch the genders and you’ve got yourself an anime.

  • The thing that’s really, really bothering me about that second cover is that Rocket Man needs a bubble helmet, but Sharpshooter Jane doesn’t

  • Ken_Begg

    That’s because she’s bursting with grrrrrrrl power, unlike that lame-o man.

  • Ken_Begg

    Nah, it would be all girl teams, basically Strike Witches in space. Although unlike the Strike Witches they don’t grow cat ears when they manifest their powers.

  • bgbear_rnh

    Hahahahahah. It’s the Wood Woodpecker Show.

  • Ah. Of course. Don’t know why I didn’t think of that. Must be slipping.

  • Marsden

    Maybe the head is all that’s left of him mounted on that little space ship, like Roboship.

    It looks like there’s more coming up in back.

  • Eric Hinkle

    That second cover — what, all that’s left of him is his head, so it’s being used to control a one-woman flying machine?

  • As for today’s MotD, I have this to say
    ***
    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “Damn it, why does he always do this? It’s not a worm, Blue, it’s my breathing tube so please don’t–”

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “Okay, fine. I’ll just gently remove–”

    Please do not touch [Alien Lifeform] with your ungloved hand, [Spaceman’s name here]. You might contaminate it with your germs and cause untold harm.

    “Oh, for the love of… Of all the times not to wear those damn gloves!”

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “Okay, okay. Just have to get back to Dome Base, get some gloves, then throttle Blue.”

    That is not advised, as–

    “Skip it, GLAD! How far am I from the Dome.”

    [Spaceman’s name here], you are a mile out and counting.

    “Wait, I didn’t walk that far. And what did you mean, and counting?”

    [Spaceman’s name here] has forgotten basic space protocol and not put on the Dome Base Safety break and the Dome is now rolling down hill.

    “What do you mean, I forgot? I never for–”

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “Argh, look, fine, just, just drive the Dome to these co-ordinates.”

    Affirmative. I will drive Dome Base to [Spaceman’s name here]‘s location.

    “Fine. Great. Estimated time of arrival.”

    Unknown. I can not begin drive procedures until the Dome Base has come to a complete stop.

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “What, why?”

    Safety procedures. Something [Spaceman’s name here] seems to know nothing about.

    “And she gets snarky with me. Great. Perfect.”

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “Okay. I can’t touch Blue, maybe I can shake him off… like…. this! And this!”

    Please do not shake [Alien Lifeform] with your ungainly thrashing about, [Spaceman’s name here]. [Alien Lifeform] has a weak stomach and it may–

    SQUAAAAAAACK!

    <Sploosh!>

    Oh no. I am too late. The poor [Alien Lifeform].

    “Did it just… oh God. WHY IS THAT EATING THROUGH MY HELMET!”

    [Spaceman’s name here], you have been exposed to a corrosive acid as well as most of the [Alien Lifeform] last meal. To follow proper safety procedures for a change, [Spaceman’s name here], please use your anti corrosive acid spray.

    “WHERE ARE THEY?!”

    They are handily placed directly on the back of your belt.

    “WHY IS THE SPRAY LOCATED ON MY B– oh, wait, I got it.”

    Apply liberally to the affected area of the helmet while taking care not dosing [Alien Lifeform].

    “Yeah, yeah, yeah.”

    “There we go. Hey, as an added bonus, Blue’s no longer at my air hose. I might be… I might be okay.

    “Okay, GLAD. What’s the ETA on Dome Base getting here?”

    Unknown. Dome Base seems to be still rolling.

    “Still?”

    It was a very large hill.

    “Okay. I’ll just start walking in the general direction. Just give me heads up when you can–”

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “Oh great. Blue’s back.”

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    SQUACK SQUACK!

    “And he’s brought his extended family. How nice of him. You know, GLAD, I think I’m going to start running your way.”

    As you wish, [Spaceman’s name here]. Be advise that there are at least three [Alien Lifeforms] along your path that might cause further damage to your suit. And they may also eat you, as well. Which may cause the spread of germs and cause untold harm.

    “I’m having… a hard time… thinking what I… hate more… You… or this… damn planet.”

    Everyone is a critic.

  • Ken_Begg

    Well…you’re a man.

  • Ken_Begg

    Man, you need your own blog with this stuff.

  • Gamera977

    Well her hair is blowing in the wind so they must be in an atmosphere or else she has a ‘Bride of the Monster’ hairdo.

  • Gamera977

    You could probably do a book of odd artwork from the public domain with whacky stories added to them.

    There’s at least one guy doing comic books using the original old public domain art with the dialog bubbles whited out and his own new silly dialog added.

    Hell, I’d buy it!

  • Ken_Begg

    As if the original dialog wasn’t silly enough.

  • What might be an interesting challenge is taking those goof public domain comics and seeing if you could make something serious out of them.