My main problem with Piranha (the original, obviously) is that the idea of using genetically altered super-piranha as bio-weapons by dumping them into rivers in enemy territory is utterly ridiculous. And I mean, ridiculous by B-movie standards. How would you keep them from traveling into friendly or neutral territory? How would you get rid of them after hostilities ceased? Etc. It’s not quite as retarded as Devilfish, but what is?
Of course, Piranha, despite being a pretty nasty film at times, was a borderline parody of the genre. Not so with Piranha II: The Spawning. Here the logistical problems with the even more radically modified monsters are a 1000% worse. Moreover, although there is some (pretty dire) comic relief in the film*, it feels generally dead serious in a way that the first film didn’t. Partly this is because male lead Lance Henriksen–whose name is amusingly misspelled in the credits–gives a typically committed and ferocious performance. He makes no concession to making his hero at all likable.
[*One really gets the idea that the comic relief was shot after first time director James Cameron left the project mid-shoot.]The film’s serious tone just makes it better in my book, though. The ludicrous nature of the flying football-sized piranhas sings all the more beautifully for the po-faced nature of the proceedings. I haven’t watched my Blu Ray yet, but I’m hoping the wires are visible (and the still indicates that the rod puppet nature of some of the effects was at least occasionally apparent), because this is the kind of film where that would make things all the better. I don’t know where the hell they intended to take things in a third film, which I’m sure they were hoping for.
What is your favorite self-evidently internally moronic monster?
