Monster of the Day #823

Updated on December 17, 2013 By Ken Begg 11 Comments

“…the suspect is swaying and his speech is slurred…”

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  • kgb_san_diego

    Oh awesome sauce! What movie is this? Not Ssssss…. Surely not a Sci-Fi thing, is it?

  • Gamera977

    ‘You can’t shed your skin here, littering is against the law!’

  • Ericb

    It’s terrible what giant snakes do in public these days. What ever happened to good old fashioned reptilian modesty?

  • Marsden

    Suspect refused to walk a line or touch his nose with his eyes closed.

  • The Rev.

    Unless I’m mistaken (and based on the prop I don’t think I am), this is King Cobra from 1999, one of the worst giant snake movies out there. It is quite dull with a bad balance of snake/non-snake scenes, snake attacks invariably shown as first-person shots that generally result in people falling over with no visible bite marks, a good-looking but mostly immobile and very rubbery prop (the scene where it “plays dead” really brings this home), and a lot of cliches and boring chatter. Pat Morita and Hoyt Axton (and by extension Hoyt’s theme song) are about the only good things I remember from it. I got the video for 2 bucks and that may have been the worst 2 bucks I ever spent. Watch Python instead if you need a giant snake movie fix. Not that Python is incredible, but it’s at least halfway good, which puts it halfway above most other giant snake movies.

  • bgbear_rnh

    He was just offering to clean the officer’s windows. He is a Vindshield Viper.

  • Ken_Begg

    Yes, I thought I had maybe reviewed it as a Video Cheese, but I didn’t. I did mention it in several other snake movie pieces, though, and each time I talked about how dreadfully boring it was.

  • Ken_Begg

    OUCH!

  • Flangepart

    I wanna fang you very much for that pun.

  • The Rev.

    Yeah, I thought you had as well, but the closest I found whilst looking for it was your mention of it and its boringness in the opening of the Python VC piece.

    It occurred to me as I wrote about KC that giant snake movies are actually an even worse subgenre as a whole than giant crocodilian movies, which I generally used to think of as a pretty poor subgenre. I can name two of the latter that are legitimately good, a couple that are not bad, and a few that are dumb but fun. Outside of Python I can’t think of a halfway decent giant snake movie. Hell, I can’t think of one that’s even dumb fun (although I’ve heard Boa vs. Python might fit the bill). Giant snake movies seem to be right up there with Bigfoot movies as far as quality, as scary as that is to contemplate.

  • The Rev.

    When your pun makes Ken groan, you have done something truly magical.