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Author Topic: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
ghoyle1
Initiate of Jabootu
Posts: 9
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Post T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 4, 2012, 10:44
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As I write, it is less than three weeks until T(ween)-Fest. Let the rumors commence! What movies will we Sandy, Ken, Chris, etc., inflict upon our tender, bleeding brains? Which star-studded luminaries will be luminating this year?

I am giddy with delight.

Guy
Chad R.
Initiate of Jabootu
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 5, 2012, 12:53
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I have consulted the Magic 8-Ball and it has disclosed to me that the T(ween) Fest 2012 lineup will be:

Witchcraft (1988)

Witchcraft II: The Temptress (1989)

Witchcraft III: The Kiss of Death (1991)

Witchcraft IV: The Virgin Heart (1992)

Witchcraft V: Dance with the Devil (1993)

Witchcraft VI: The Devil’s Mistress (1994)

Witchcraft VII: Judgement Hour (1995)

Witchcraft VIII: Salem’s Ghost (1996)

Witchcraft IX: Bitter Flesh (1997)

Witchcraft X: Mistress of the Craft (1998)

Witchcraft XI: Sisters in Blood (2000)

Witchcraft XII: In the Lair of the Serpent (2002)

Witchcraft XIII: Blood of the Chosen (2006)

The festival will run through Sunday and there will be a five hundred dollar fee to leave early.
ghoyle1
Initiate of Jabootu
Posts: 9
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 5, 2012, 17:36
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Such a high fee might encourage the suicide rate.
The Rev.
Initiate of Jabootu
Posts: 44
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 6, 2012, 08:38
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Hopefully Ken will stimulate interest for TwF2k12 by posting my T-Fest write-up in the near future.

My crack team of insider ninjas tells me it's to be a "Greatest Hits" line-up...

Samurai Cop

Chastity

Blood Feast

The New Gladiators

Nightmare City

Theodore Rex

The Harrad Experiment

Funky Forest
Mr.-
Rational
Initiate of Jabootu
Posts: 9
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 7, 2012, 13:56
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I have obtained the T(ween)-Fest lineup by the simple expedient of sneaking into Sandy's house at 3:30 in the morning -- not a soul in sight.

Ahem.

In any case, TREMBLE at this year's selections:

Snakes on a Train
I Am Omega
Transmorphers
(dinner break)
Death Valley: The Revenge of Bloody Bill
Sunday School Musical
Dragon
The Day the Earth Stopped
Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus
Chad R.
Initiate of Jabootu
Posts: 8
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 8, 2012, 08:47
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Ha! You fell for the old Decoy-Bad-Movie-Lineup-In-The-Suspiciously-Convenient-Location trick! You should have known Sandy would never leave such an important document out in the open next to a plate of cookies and a sign that says "Definitely the real lineup and not a decoy." I however happen to know that he keeps the really secret stuff in a secret cubbyhole behind the mummy case next to the piranha tank! Hence I know that the really real lineup is:

Strike Commando

Rats: Night of Terror

Shocking Dark

The Other Hell

Zombi 3

Seven Magnificent Gladiators

Cruel Jaws

Strike Commando 2

admin
Administrator
Posts: 29
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 8, 2012, 08:55
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Really, Rev? You're comparing Harrad Experiment (or even Chastity or Samurai Cop) to Funky Forest and Theodore Rex?

I call shenanigans on that. Good grief, have we forgotten Shredder Orpheus?

Don't know if Sandy wants to sit on the line-up. If not, I'll post it later. It's mostly done at this point.
admin
Administrator
Posts: 29
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 8, 2012, 09:20
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Besides, you're all way off. To increase our popularity with the female demographic, we allowed Patty Draut to choose our line-up this time around. She's opted for:

Twilight
New Moon
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

Sadly, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 isn't out yet, but Patty will fill the remainder of the time by acting out the action of the upcoming film, augmented with readings of selected highlights from the novel. (She reportedly plans on recruiting the Two Chads to act out the Edward and Jacob roles.)

Patty will also give a lecture after each film detailing what events from the novels were cut for time reasons, so that the audience can fully appreciate the full sweep of the story.
Chad R.
Initiate of Jabootu
Posts: 8
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 8, 2012, 10:23
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Team Jacob! WHOOOOOOOOO!
admin
Administrator
Posts: 29
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Post Re: T(ween)-Fest is Nigh!
on: March 8, 2012, 10:28
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Yeesh. Any chance to take off your shirt.
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