JABOOTU the bad movie dimension

“Did you see who bit you?” he asks. Then we’re treated to a flashback of Rayne running into Amanda, being startled and biting her, then taking Amanda’s swords and running off as Amanda falls to the ground. (Vampires love the circus; they always go for the juggler. Alright, that joke bit.)
Despite the flashback, Amanda [...]

Back to the boat as it pulls up at Brimstone’s Headquarters, which apparently is a secret castle on an island. Katerin appears to have gotten there before them. Inside, she explains that the Rome headquarters of Brimstone have fallen and that the Rib artifact is in Kagan’s hand.
This is shown to be so as Kagan [...]

As I write this, the fourth season of American Idol is humming along like a runaway locomotive packed with stupid loud people. I understand this season’s ratings scam was Paula Abdul—former Raider Girl butt-shaker and helium-voiced diva dorkette—making it with one of the contestants. The shtick, for our international visitors, is that three judges listen [...]

Editor note: Unfamiliar with the movie this is a sequel to? Click here.

First off, this review was a collaborative effort between Patrick Coyle and me. Patrick and I have corresponded since before the Dungeons and Dragons: The Movie review and we eventually hit upon a deal. He had reviews in various stages of [...]

I’ll confess right off that I’ve always had a soft spot for romantic fantasy. From my earliest cognizant days I harbored a liking for medieval fairy tales of princes on horses and opulent castles and the whole bit. One of my first real memories was of Diana and Charles’ wedding, and I confess to buying [...]

I write this review as penance for spending money on this movie and maybe being partly responsible for any sequel. For these crimes against humanity, I am truly sorry.
The critics universally rapped the knuckles of Freddy Got Fingered. That in itself shouldn’t be surprising. “T & A” movies and “gross out” movies or, more generally, [...]